Archive for the ‘Uncategorised’ Category

Poem

23 July 2021

SSSSHHH

 

 

 

 

 

He’s quiet now.

Sleeping.

His usually tidy hair soaked with sweat

I look at him with love. Or hate. Or both

And I wonder

Is this what all monsters look like when they are sleeping?

 

He’s quiet now

Deep in slumber

The enormity of what just happened envelops me and sadness fills the air like invisible thick black smoke.

Choking me.

It was MY fault. It’s always my fault.

A single tear trickles down my face.

Alone. Like me.

 

HE may be quiet but there’s still noise

I cover my ears to drown out the sound. But I know only I can hear it

Hammering in my head, LOUD.

So loud.

I want it to stop.

I wanted HIM to stop.

Yet here I am. Reliving it. Over and over.

That look. Cold and threatening. Like a wild animal. And I’m his prey, fear coursing through my veins

Because we’ve been here before and I know what comes next.

I want to run

Why can’t I run?

The cruel words, taunting, stinging my already fragile soul

USELESS. IDIOT.

He deserves better.

I’m sure that’s what he said.

Before the words turned into punches and all I could hear was my own trapped screams and my soul shattering.

Silently

Because he doesn’t like hearing ME

 

He’s so quiet now

His anger abated

Through my swollen eyes I see the mess and I mourn the promises and dreams now broken into pieces.

Like the plate his carefully prepared dinner was on before the rage

It was his favourite

It had changed yet I didn’t know. How did I not know?

He’s right. I am STUPID. IDIOT. WORTHLESS

My heart hurts more than any bruise ever will

Rage, fury, face twisted. Red for danger.

It’s MY fault he gets angry, it’s MY fault he gets mad and it’s MY fault that he hurts me

I’m the worst he’s ever had. He says.

 

Just words.

 

But they cut through me like a sharpened blade

He said “why can’t you just be quiet WOMAN” as his fist crashed into my face

But I WAS quiet.

It was he who wasn’t.

PATHETIC. UGLY. USELESS, DISGRACE

I’m not worthy of this mighty man, I’m a total waste of space

 

But there it is again.

A tiny whisper from within my being

Trying to be heard, trying to make me listen

Questioning, wondering

What happened to the young me?

SHE was SO full of hope. And grand plans for a life filled with adventure and friendship and love.

Definitely love.

Back in those carefree, fun filled days with music and friends and fun and laughter and dance.

Oh how we danced as we watched the sun set on another day filled with memories to cherish

And I realise

That’s all I have left. Memories.

The friends, fun and laughter are gone now. Lost forever.

And I have no tune to dance to

I remember being asked ‘what do you want to be when you grow up’

But I don’t remember saying sad, hurt, lonely.

ABUSED

Yet here I am.

Being quiet.

 

But HE’s quiet now

I like it when he’s quiet

Ssshhhhh

 

Anonymous.

 




Fleeing domestic abuse – a young person’s story

20 July 2021

My Story by Sophie

The sound of my alarm woke me up, I was dreading the day already, I peered through the window and was met with a cold breeze that hit my sensitive skin, the sound of the rain falling gave me peace and relaxation and a safe feeling. As the day went by, I was called by my teacher “hey Sophie” the office wants you. I had this feeling or was it intuition it was not going to be sweet and oh boy was I right. As I stepped in to the head teacher’s office I examined the room, I felt confused to why I was there and why my ex-head teacher Mrs Windrush was there too, her facial expressions told me she had something to say and I was not too sure I would like It.

She asked me to sit down I could see her mouth move but could not hear what she was saying, I was in a daze, Mrs Windrush asked me if I was okay but all I was thinking about was her name I always thought it was a stupid name. Mrs Windrush. Mrs Windrush like the wind rushing through the trees. Then I heard her say Sophie, Sophie…. suddenly I brought myself back to reality.

Mrs Windrush started talking about my dad, saying mum packed up some of our belongings and was at my old school with my brothers and sisters. I was told I would not see my dad again. I was flabbergasted and shocked. I just didn’t know what to say, a tear dropping on to my delicate skin, the redness in my eyes was obvious. Still in disbelief we went to the police station I still couldn’t comprehend what happened. I just shrugged it off. Hours later we were all in a hotel for the night, more and more people were talking to mum. We moved from house to house to house to house we kept moving and it took a major toll on me.

Social workers were always at our home asking us questions about home life. I would lie and say that nothing questionable happened just to protect my dad but one day I decided to reflect on everything, my childhood. So you see, I now realise my childhood was questionable. Things that I knew from the get go were wrong. Whenever I did anything wrong Dad would put me in this little storage room which had no windows, it was really dusty and he put me in there. I would say this was the least painful thing, I recall my “FATHER” would beat me for the stupidest things like if I did not read my school book he would beat me with a stick, his leg, his hand, broom, teeth and threats.  He would get his finger and dig it in to my collar bone. I would feel so much pain from this, the pain would last days and I wouldn’t be able to move my arm for days. The beatings were not the most painful thing. His words were so harming. I would threaten to kill myself he would laugh and say “do it do it “it hurt so much.

As a kid I would get weird intrusive thoughts, doing something like reading I would get intrusive thoughts I would feel so tired of the voices in my head and when I went home it was no better. So when I reflected, I got thinking and realised I am not saying anything about my Dad, it was him who did it. His actions caused consequences. If my mum never got help, I would be in a different country with no passport and dad would leave us there.

 

I love you. Thank you for listening.  As written by Sophie (age 12) for staff in our safe accommodation.




Cycle of Abuse

1 June 2021

Leaving any relationship is never an easy decision to make, nor an easy one to carry out.

But although there may be hurdles to overcome for domestic abuse victims, both emotional and practical, with support and time to heal, it is possible to rebuild your confidence and enjoy life to the full again.
If you recognise the cycle of abuse and want support to break the cycle, get in touch.



Open for face to face appointments

28 May 2021

Exciting news!

We are happy to share with you that as of Monday 17th May, our office will be OPEN for face to face appointments. This now includes walk in appointments as well as pre booked appointments.

Whilst this is very welcome news for us, we ask that any visitors to the office wear a mask and use the sanitiser provided either at the bottom or top of the stairs.

Staff will also be wearing masks until further notice and we will work hard to keep the premises clean and sanitised for you all.

The safety and wellbeing of all visitors and staff is of utmost importance and we appreciate your cooperation.

A big step in the right direction.